Much of the stress you suffer is your choice. Yes, I said it — your.choice. And my choice. And I suck at that at times as much as you do. Maybe more. Even though I “should” know better, right?
Okay, so that proves I’m human. Guessing you are, too. Not much we can do about being human and making mistakes. But what is super cool about being human is that you can choose to learn and change. You can make different choices. Like what not to stress about.
That’s why I tell you that a lot of stress is purely of your choosing. I want you to open your eyes to the times when you’re crapping up your health and making your life harder and less enjoyable. That’s not living well.
Still with me? Or fuming that I tried to tell you that you’re choosing to stress? I can hear you say it: “Really, Cindy? Do you not get my life? Do you live in some glass bubble? I bet you don’t have to deal with nagging in-laws (true, I don’t) and horrible traffic (yeah, true again, most of the time) or kids who are pulling out each other’s hair (thankfully, no again, my dear kids are long grown and tend to be pretty nice to each other).”
Alright, so is that why I don’t have as much stress to non-choose? No. I have plenty of things that can make me as stressed as the next person. Drivers who cut me off or go too slow. People who are a royal pain in the ass. Things that go wrong. Packages that are late. A goof up somewhere else. Rude people. Ridiculously long, invasive, un-human security at airports.
The difference is recognizing the times when you really can choose to let go and stop allowing yourself to get angry, frustrated and stressed out. You can’t change that driver. Nothing you shout and no fingers you choose to use will make that person be more courteous or safer or faster, right? So, why stress about it? You can’t do a thing except … let it go and choose not to damage your body with extra stress.
If the checkout lane you got in moves slow, will fuming and fussing make it move faster? It absolutely won’t. In fact, I can pretty much say it will make it worse. So, why choose to stress about it? Give up, relax, and if you’re in a grocery store, read the nice magazines they so thoughtfully provide there. 🙂
Get it? A lot of this is choice. Yes, I’ll agree that some is not or really damn hard to let go of it. That you deal with in other ways. Here are some suggestions: 5 ways to relieve your stress. Or: The pause that does your body good. Or: You’re a woman and you’re stressed? No kidding! How to fix that.
As far as the others — toss them to the curb. You can’t change the driver, the slow cashier, the rude person, the whatever, but you can change you. You can let it go, laugh it off and be proud that you’re so damn smart in doing so. You’ve chosen to live well, not live angry and stressed and … ill.
Watch it for awhile. Catch yourself, re-group, distract yourself, do whatever it takes for you to stop being so aware of others’ foibles. Soon enough, you’ll get really good at not choosing stress.
